Oh man, I don't know what to do. I'm itching for another one. I know that it isn't realistic that I'll get pregnant again. Part of me doesn't want to. But I am thinking about adoption again. I haven't mentioned it to Brad at all. I don't know what he would think. I do know though that if we do adopt, I want to find out about the shots that would allow me to breastfeed. I enjoyed it so much with Riley, that bonding time was so nice! And I would HATE HATE HATE to have to use formula. I already have the diapers. Of course, we just got rid of all our baby stuff! I've given a ton of stuff to a friends bro and wife. And just last week we took 13 bags of clothes to hospice.
I know that I need to talk to Brad about it. It's a hard call. I mean, if I were to get pg again I would be thrilled. But I wonder a little bit about adopting. Riley is starting to get more self sufficent. I don't have to spend every waking hour taking care of him. A new baby would set that back. I'm just at a loss. I don't know what I should do. Maybe I should bring it up to Brad just so I have someone to talk to about it all. I CAN'T go back to trying to get pregnant. I just can't. It was too stressful and too painful. If it happens great, but I just don't know what I should do about the adoption thing.
ARGH!!!!! I wrote this hoping for some clarity, but I'm not getting that.
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