Tuesday, June 14, 2011

The inlaws

Well, where to start.

My in laws have never been really involved. Demanding of time? Yes. They would expect us to do for them, and usually it wasn't an issue to do them. But if it was an issue it was a huge sigh and this whole “Oh, we don't know what we will do!” Brad was often guilted into spraying the vineyard because “Oh, we can't afford to hire someone!” Yes, he got paid. But no where near as much as they would pay a vineyard employee.

After Riley was born we thought that they would want to be involved. But they didn't. We would invite them to things and they couldn't be bothered. In fact, after knowing the dates of both my baby showers, she made plans for them to be on trips both of those weekends. They never said no to babysitting, except the time that I didn't know they were coming back the night before. But they never made an effort to see him. Even when we lived across the street.

Last summer when everything was going on with my dad they were pretty good. Calling regularly to check on things, offering to run food over, things like that. So they were good there. They were supposed to leave 4 days before the funeral but they rescheduled their trip, paying the fees associated with changing your tickets like that. So again, really good. No one expected them to do that.

She decided to host Thanksgiving, which was fine. Everyone was there, my mom, Ty & Gab, some friends of theirs. A lot of fun. Although I don't think she was thrilled that my pies were totally gone and her's was barely touched. But that is when it all started. That was when they informed T & G that they were staying with them for a month, from when their house closed in early Dec until they left for France in Jan. No, they did not ask, they informed. Keep in mind they knew full well that G's parents and her brother & his wife were coming for Christmas. Not to mention that their lease specifies no guests for more than 2 weeks.

So during this time T & G asked them if it would be possible for them to stay somewhere else while her family was visiting, for one week of it not both weeks. Reasonable? We all think so! The inlaws, however, did not find it reasonable to be asked to stay somewhere else when everyone had known since summer that these other house guests were coming. You would have thought that they were thrown out in the snow! Never mind that G had pretty much set something up for them (something that they had said they had inquired about but hadn't). They ended up staying there the rest of the time. Christmas Eve was rather . . . tense. Lol

They came to T & G's on Christmas, but barely talked to us. Whatever. On Christmas day they were invited to my mom's for lunch/dinner & to T & G's for breakfast. They quickly stopped by both places on their way to the hotel they were staying in. When they stopped at my Mom's he made the comment “Oh, I guess the recession didn't hit here” in regard to the toys and gifts Riley was given. Keep in mind those gifts were from so many different places. It wasn't like they were all from us! But whatever, he can piss off. They didn't even stay long enough to see my mom who was getting dressed. They called when they were 5 minutes away.

So off they went to France. No biggie. We only heard from them if they wanted/needed something. Typical. When they got back they were going to stay with T & G for a week before heading to Maine. Then they decided to stay at a hotel near their storage unit. Fine. Then they decided to stay with T & G. Whatever. They left for Maine.

They had bought a boat in Southern California and were having some work done on it while in France. The work wasn't done when they were leaving, so they left the boat. Then the guy stopped returning their calls, they couldn't reach anyone. They got a call from a gal who worked at the shop that the shop was locked down by the police and the owner was on the run from the cops. Brad went down & was able to do some inquiring and could see the boat. A few phone calls later and FIL flew out to see if he could get the boat. Totally put G out by staying there and just generally being rude. And this is where everything went to hell.

He arrived Wed night. That night J invited him to his baseball came Thurs night. He promised. He promised his grandson that he would go to the game. Then Thurs came. He went & was able to get the boat. Great. Back to the house where he informed T & G that he wouldn't be staying that night. MIL would be flying in & they were going to head back to Maine. He left 20 minutes before the kids got home. So he didn't even have the balls to tell J himself that he wasn't staying, he left that to Ty.

And they didn't even leave that night. Nope. They went to a hotel & stayed there for the night.

In the midst of all of this there were texts back & forth with Brad & his mom about how they were here and he couldn't believe they weren't seeing the kids, how Riley wanted to see them. But you know, they had contractors coming. Oh yes, God forbid the contractors don't have you there. Heaven forbid you don't see your grandsons. Assholes.

So now we're at a point where pretty much no one is talking to them. We are all so sick of it. I don't care if I ever see them again. I'm so tired of this crap. So tired of it all being about them. They don't care about any of us. They never care if they see us or their grandsons. I have no respect for them anymore. None. And yet as I meet people & they hear my last name they rave about how great of a teacher she was. And I have to smile and nod.

I'm so done with them.

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