Saturday, March 29, 2008

Trains trains and more trains

Well, it is official. Riley is getting bored with his wooden trains. He was playing more with his G-Scale trains. Then he started to get bored with those. Now he is playing more with his H-O Scale trains. They are much smaller. I find it amazing that he can put them on the track! I sure can't.

He so loves his little trains. He runs around the house, choo-chooing like a train. He will even tell us "I twain! CHOO-CHOO!" and then run off. He loves his trains. I don't mind it. It isn't so much a Riley only toy. It's a Riley & Daddy & Papa & Opa toy. He is so cute when he lays on the floor to watch the trains go by.

A train just derailed and he is telling us "Twain bwoke". Now he is trying to get it back on the track!

We had gymnastics yesterday. He would swing from the rings, then this little girl would. He would say "I terwn." or "Her terwn" depending on whose turn it was. Very cute. He is getting really good at the taking turns, sharing thing. If we can get him potty trained (or would that be "twained"?) he will do good in preschool!


Monday, March 24, 2008

Had fun today

Met Krista and the girls at Funtastic for some play. They had fun, although they closed really early today, which stank. Riley could have used more time. Course, he's zonked out now! lol Then we went to Target and Riley & I went to Nugget. Is it bad that the produce guy knows us? lol He recognized Riley. And me. He's a nice guy. Encourages Riley with his carrot stealing ways. Although today we had no issues. Because I bought sprinkles for making cookies and he played with those.

Tomorrow I have jury duty. Karen is going to watch Riley because Tracey is on vacation this week and Brad is working.

Supposedly we're going to know about the engineer job in 2 days. I don't believe it. I also don't think that Brad is getting it. I think that they think that they'd be stupid to lose their best operator and trainer. We'll see. It would be less money, but that's fine. We can still do it. And hopefully I will be getting a job for fall. I hope.

I really lost it today at Brad. Poor guy. I just don't know anymore. I am so . . . I just don't know. I'm just DONE. I need a weekend away. And I was supposed to get one. But now it looks like my folks are going to be out of town, which they need, even though they had agreed to keep Riley. I'm just tired. I need a weekend of sleep and rest and just doing NOTHING. Because even when I'm home with Brad he makes me feel like crap if I don't do SOMEthing. Oh well. I'm just hoping that I can get away.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

The funeral

The funeral was beautiful. Father Lee was nearly impossible to understand. He also seemed to get a little bit impatient when we weren't responding correctly. *IBEREH* HELLO! IT'S A FUNERAL! We weren't really a large group, other than family only Bill & Leanne, Al & Carroll, Josie & her daughter, Andrea (*eye roll*), Gina, Amy and Nadine came to the church. That was it. That is NOT a lot of people to hear in that HUGE church! Not to mention there were enough non-Catholics who wouldn't know what to do ANYWAY! ARGH!

The casket was beautiful. White, with pink with roses on the corners and in small areas on the sides. With some pink tinge toward the top. It was really nice.

So many people came. I mean, not really a LOT, but it was nice! Carroll, of course, wanted to help. As did Cathy. I made Jennifer help though! She took the plastic off all the meats and cheeses while I took them to the table. Everyone was great, it was great that Jeff was out too. That was just a fluke, but a nice one. It was good to see him and to talk to him about the baby. :) I'm feeling better about that, we'll see how I feel when he gets here.

Aunt Tina, as expected, had a rough time because that was her last sister. She commented on how much I helped, all the while with a pointed GLARE at Dina. lol As usual. She always makes comments like that, while glaring at Dina.

We went to Dave & Busters last night. Which was fun. Took Dina with us, to give Mom & Dad some time to just . . . do NOTHING. Brad, of course, insisted on buying her dinner, but let her buy the next round of drinks, which was actually 2 beers for Brad, 2 gin & tonics for her, and a cherry coke for me. When we got home, she went to bed, Brad & Riley went down and I vegged.

Dina, of course, sat on her butt through the party after the funeral. But whatever. I'm pretty used to that at this point. At least I know that I did what needed to be done and I can feel good about that. I just don't understand that "sit on my ass and let everyone else do the work" mentality that she has.


Sunday, March 16, 2008

I love my husband

Today, he promised to help me deal with Dina. Complete with trash bags and duct tape. :) What would I do without him? I know that even though she doesn't drive him as crazy as she does me, he understands. He gets it. I just don't feel like I can deal with her. We'll see how it all goes.


Saturday, March 15, 2008

I still haven't cried. I don't know if that is evident of being so prepared for Nana's death, or of me being a cold callous person.

I know that she had some good points to her. I remember her being happy, but she hasn't been for years. The last ten, fifteen years, have her being miserable, bitter and just plain nasty. I loved her, but she was NOT a nice person. I could go on and on about how differently she treated me and Dina. But what is the point?

And speaking of Dina. *IBEREH* She will be coming out for the funeral. I don't know yet when she arrives, or when she leaves, but please God, give me the energy to deal with her. She is going to be going on and on and on about "Nana this and Nana that" and "I miss her soooooo much" as she cries her big fat annoying FAKE crocodile tears. I am going to need so much strength to deal with her. I'm sure that there will be some sort of question about money or jewelry or SOMETHING as well. You know, maybe I'm weird. I just don't care about those things.

I don't know what I am going to do when she starts her whining. God, I am just going to need strength and energy for this one. While I am not crying and going on and on, I am on edge. I know I'm due to start my period, so that isn't helping. But I know that there is more to it than that. I know that stress about this job for Brad, I know that worrying about applying for jobs for me and if there will BE any jobs for me, is adding to my stress level. I don't know. I am just feeling STRESSED! I need to be able to relax. I had thought about scheduling a massage, but I just don't know when I will be able to go. Maybe April.

There is a girls weekend coming up. I can't wait. The weekend of April 11. Brad is scheduled, so Mom & Dad are planning to take Riley, but I just don't know if they will be able to. I hope that they can. The last weekend away got cancelled. But I hope that this one doesn't. I need it! lol We all do.

Oh well, that's it for now. Later!

*IBEREH*= "Insert Big Eye Rolling Emoticon Here"

Friday, March 14, 2008

Not sure what to feel

I'm not sure what I feel, or what I should feel. Maybe Shawna said it best when she said that I was feeling two VERY intense emotions at the same time. And I am.

I am sad. Of COURSE I am sad. I'm not a monster. My Nana died. Of course I feel sad. But at the same time, I am happy. She was miserable. She was incoherent. She was yelling at my Dad in Italian the other day, calling him Frank. That's his Dad, who has been dead since well before I was born.

I remember being little, gosh Mom & Dad were married yet!, and being at her apt. She had a little parakeet and he was walking on the table while I ate toast with cinnamon and sugar. I remember her telling me that cookies and other baked goods taste better if you mix them by hand, with either a wooden spoon or a whisk. The only time I use an electric mixer for baked things is when I am making a really large amount. I do it all by hand. lol Even today.

I am going to miss her. But she has been failing. She has been miserable. She has been in pain. But now, now she is at peace. How nice. She is with family, her husband that she hasn't seen in decades, her daughter who only lived for 3 days, her son, her sister, her brother, she is with friends who have died before her. I am SURE that her and my Pop are fighting, as they always did. lol But she is with Jesus, she is in Heaven. I know that this is what she has been wanting.

While it might be odd to say . . . praise God for taking her.


Friday, March 07, 2008

Birthdays and olive oil

Brad is, of course, working. But Riley & I went to Jedi's third b-day party tonight. The neighbors came, they are so sweet. And Shawna's folks and sister in law. And me & Riley. That was it. We didn't give him anything big, but he doesn't care. He's THREE.

I can't believe that he's three. That means that in five short months, Riley will be three. How did he get so big, so fast? I don't understand it at all. I did not give permission for Riley to get so big, so fast. Three. That's like, a preschooler! Insane.

I went to the dr on Wed. Annoying. She tells me that my cholesterol is high. Well, sort of. My GOOD cholesterol is too low. Which puts my total cholesterol .4 too high. Her advice? Exercise more and add olive oil to my diet. What, am I supposed to DRINK the stuff? I don't use any OTHER oil. And how much more an I supposed to exercise? I either walk or do Satori stuff 5 days a week. Absolutely no help at all. No help on how to lose the weight. "Exercise more, eat less." Yeah, ok lady. How about some REAL ideas. I watch my portions, I exercise, I don't know what else to do. I eat everything that "they" say to eat, and little to none of the stuff "they" say not to eat. Dr. Laurie, my chiropractor, thinks that I might have an intolerance to something and that is causing me to not be able to get the weight off.

I mean, who GAINS on WW? Yes, I lost at first, then I gained 10 lbs. Not really normal. I just don't know what to do anymore. I hate my body. I WANT to lose. I get so excited at Satori when I can feel those lower stomach muscles. In fact, the gals have laughed at me, not really at me, more like with me, when I react when I feel those lower muscles. It is weird because I haven't felt them since before I had Riley!

I just don't know what to do anymore about the weight. Frustrating.


Tuesday, March 04, 2008

But how can I complain?

When it is carrots that he takes from the bin at the market and starts to eat? I mean, really! CARROTS! Don't most children, IF they "steal" food at the grocery market, take candy? Or things that they aren't allowed to eat? Not mine. He grabs CARROTS. And grapes that have fallen out of the bag and are on the floor.

We were at the market tonight and they have these neat looking displays for the produce. Unfortunately, they go very low. Brad was grabbing some celery and Riley grabbed a carrot and took a bite. And we're talking a full, normal carrot! Then he goes over, still holding his carrot, and starts grabbing grapes off the floor. Brad had moved a bag and a few fell out. Riley starts to shove them in his mouth! The produce manager is laughing so hard I was surprised that he could still stand. He gets the store manager, who is also hysterical.

So now that carrot is cut up, with a stalk of celery and some sugar snap peas, in a bowl with curry vinagrette, in Riley's lunch sack for day care tomorrow. Because what exactly is a lunch without his little salad? Everyday he gets this salad, and everyday it is the only thing in his lunch that is totally gone.

But really, how can I complain?


Sunday, March 02, 2008

Oh yeah, he's a monkey!

At my parents, Riley sleeps in a play pen/pack and play/whatever you want to call it. Well, he has taken to climbing out of it. Yesterday at nap he climbed out twice. Last night at bed time, he climbed out. Today at nap, he climbed out once. Papa put him back. The second time, he got stuck over the side. lol Third time he closed the bedroom door and started to play, so they let him. Then the door opened and he walked out. And this conversation happened:

Papa: What are you doing up?
Riley: (Looks at him.)
Papa: You're supposed to be taking a NAP!
Riley: (shrugs shoulders) Oh well.

Nice huh? What to do with this kid!

Saturday, March 01, 2008

My weekend

Yep, Brad had his vasectomy yesterday. He is doing really well in fact. He took ONE pain pill last night before bed and that is it. Today he says that all he feels is a slight pulling. I am thrilled that he isn't in pain. :) We went to lunch today, at the brewery, and hit an estate sale and a friends of the library book sale. I got a grocery bag of books for $5!! Most of them will be for the classroom, if I ever get one.

Riley got his hair cut this morning. Then he conned my mom into a cookie from the bakery. I don't know WHY she buys them for him. He always says that he wants one, and he gets a nice, cute cut out cookie, frosted and the whole bit, only to eat NONE of it at all. And this happens every time she gets his haircut! (Which she has done more than I have I think, or at least as many times!) He just adores Mr. Jason who cuts his hair down there. I think more than he likes Ms. Deirdre up here. Although Ms. Deirdre has a tractor chair for him. I was going to try the barbershop here in town, they have a fire engine, but when Mom hear that their cuts were $10 she freaked and said "No! I'll take him to Jason!" Never mind that some students have gone to this new barber shop and they look great! But apparently a $10 haircut is just crap to her. This is the same woman that made me go to Super Cuts till high school! lol

I had hoped to go out with Shawna and Kevin this weekend. But she has the same cold that we had last week. So that is a bummer. Although probably a good thing because I would hate to be off somewhere having fun and having to say "Oh, Brad's nuts hurt . . . gotta run!" Although THAT would be good for a laugh between Shawna and I!

I have no sub jobs lined up for next week either. I am sure that I will get some calls during the week though. And since Brad is on his 7 off I can take something for anyday. And the following week I have Tues, Wed, and Thurs booked already for Barbara. I am getting interesting requests for me for subbing. I was requested last week by a teacher that I had never been to. I thought that it was odd. Turns out that the lady at the sub desk told him to request me, as did his wife who is a principal at another school I've subbed at. Thurs afternoon I got a call from the sub lady, Nancy, asking me if I could do special ed at one of the schools on Fri. Apparently the principal there requested me! My biggest concern now is getting hired for fall. With the budget cuts that will be coming (thank YOU, idiots in Sacramento!) I don't know that I will be able to get hired. I hope for at least a temporary position, I don't need benefits, and that would put me in a good position for next year. The thing is, I am already well liked, but there just needs to be the positions available for me to apply for.

I am trying to get a lot of cleaning done this weekend. With Riley gone I can really move stuff and get rid of stuff that he doesn't play with. Of course, I still have a touch of the cold from last weekend so I do some and then I need to rest. And Brad can't do a whole lot, so it falls to me. Oh well. I hope to get more done tonight and tomorrow. We were supposed to go out tonight, but now I am wondering if we should or if we should just stay home. We at least need to run out and get dinner. I so need to go grocery shopping! Maybe tomorrow!

We are going to check out a new church tomorrow. The associate pastor was the high school pastor at our last church. And it is the same denomination as our last one. I'm not much of one for denomination, but we really liked the last church. We just weren't thrilled with the drive! They are having their first service at the new location tomorrow, so we will go and see if we like it. I don't know what I will do next weekend when Brad is at work though. Go there or to the place that we've been going to. They are the same distance. It will depend on how I feel about this place tomorrow. I always feel weird going to a new church without Brad. We'll see! I don't even know if we will like it. We really really enjoy the worship at GVCC. So who knows. We will have to see. I just haven't felt very connected at GVCC. We will have to see what it is like at LHCC.

Alright, we need to go get dinner and all of that good stuff! Later!